TOPIC 6 BUSINESS WRITING 2
10 OUMH2203_topic06
LEARNING OUTCOMES
By the end of this topic, you should be able to:
1. List the steps involved in writing good business letters;
2. Differentiate between good news, neutral and bad news letters;
3. Explain the differing types of information in different kinds of
business letters;
4. Practise subject-verb agreement in sentence construction; and
5. Write different types of business letters effectively.
INTRODUCTION
This topic provides you with exposure to, and practice in,
effective letter writing (please refer to Figure 6.1). You will be
introduced to various types of business correspondence, including
letters of application, letters of enquiry, letters of complaint, etc.
There are also exercises to help you develop the vocabulary and
grammatical skills needed to comprehend and write effective
business letters.
Figure 6.1: Letter writing is an art
Source: [Letter Writing]. Retrieved February 11,
2010, from:
http://www.soton.ac.uk/citizened/activities/active_citizenship/tasktwo_letterwriting.html
6.1 WRITING BUSINESS LETTERS
How do we write a good business letter? There is no simple answer to this
question. However, a good business letter definitely needs careful planning and
should never be written in haste. It is the responsibility of the writer to impress
upon the recipient the senderÊs professional image and to emphasise the
importance of the communication. A poorly-written business letter can result in
misunderstanding and put the companyÊs finances and reputation at stake.
An effective business letter is written with certain objectives in mind and
expresses these clearly. The information is usually well organised and the writer
always tries to meet the needs of the recipient. You may use the seven steps
outlined in Figure 6.2 as a checklist for writing good business letters.
Figure 6.2: The seven steps for writing good business documents
6.2 TYPES BUSINESS LETTERS
Letters generally fall into three categories. They are:
(a) „Good news‰ letters;
(b) „Neutral‰ letters; and
(c) „Bad news‰ letters.
Commonly, „good news‰ and „neutral‰ letters are written with the aim of
giving or asking for information. These letters usually try to achieve one or more
of the following purposes or objectives:
Make an inquiry;
Forward a request;
Reply to an inquiry/request;
Acknowledge receipt of letter;
Introduce self and organisation;
Inform about organisationÊs services and activities;
Grant a loan or extend credit;
Confirm success at an interview; and
Make a special offer for valued customers.
ACTIVITY 6.1
Based on the purposes of letters mentioned, identify the type and
purpose of the letters in Activity 5.8 (Paperwalls Marketing Ltd.) and
Figure 5.3 (Cleanwizards Ltd.) in Topic 5.
(a) Are these „good news‰, „neutral‰ or „bad news‰ letters?
(b) What is the purpose of each of these letters?
6.2.1 “Good News” and “Neutral” Business Letters
When you look at business letters, you will notice that the ordering of
information is important. This refers to the arrangement of ideas and paragraphs.
This ordering is important because it affects the reader's flow of thoughts and
how he or she would react to the letter.
In most cases, we present information in a direct manner for „good news‰ and
„neutral‰ business letters. However, the details in each paragraph may differ
slightly, according to the purpose of the letter. Generally, the contents of a „good
news‰ letter follow this order:
Identify the purpose of the letter in the subject line or opening paragraph;
Place the good news in the opening paragraph;
State the details that support the good news in the middle paragraphs; and
Close with a statement of goodwill.
ACTIVITY 6.2
The following paragraphs are found in the body of a „good news‰ letter.
Rearrange the paragraphs so that they read smoothly, based on the order
normally used in such letters. Then write down, in order of appearance,
the letters of the paragraphs (a, b, c ...) in the space given thereafter.
(a) We would also like to inform you that students may choose one of
the two structures offered. They may choose a modular
programme or one that requires an end-of-the-year examination.
In addition, the institution offers scholarships to students based
on their performance in the first year of study.
(b) We are an established institution with international accreditation.
Our partner universities are the University of Nova Scotia and
University of Cumberland, both from the United Kingdom. We
have a range of courses at the tertiary level including Bachelor,
Master and Doctorate degrees for a variety of disciplines.
(c) Thank you for your letter dated 23 September enquiring about the
types of courses available at our institution and the fees for each of
these courses.
(d) Enclosed, you will find our prospectus for the September/October
intake this year. The fees suggested include tuition and lab fees
where relevant. The mode of payment of the fees can be negotiated.
Please do not hesitate to contact me or my office if you would like
any further information.
(e) We look forward to hearing from you and welcoming you as our
student.
Order of information: _______, _______, _______, _______, ______
Letters categorised as „good news‰ or „neutral letters‰ include the following:
(a) Letter of Inquiry
A letter of inquiry is written when we need to ask for more information
concerning a product or service that interests us. We may have heard or read
about a product in an advertisement in the newspaper, a magazine or a
commercial on television. However, we often need more information before
making a decision about purchasing the product. Hence, a letter of inquiry,
which is also categorised as a neutral letter, is written. This uses the „good
news‰ letter format. Here are some points to remember when ordering
information in a letter of enquiry.
The start:
Dear Sir or Madam.
Although it is very formal, you may also use „To Whom It May
Concern‰ as you do not know the person you are writing to.
Giving reference:
With reference to your advertisement in...
Regarding your advertisement in ...
Requesting a catalogue, brochure, etc:
After the reference, add a comma and continue for example, „Referring
to your advertisement, would (could) you please send me ...?
Requesting further information:
I would also like to know ...
Could you tell me whether...
Signature:
Yours faithfully this is very formal as you do not know the person you
are writing to.
(b) Letter for Placing Orders
A letter of order is written when you are certain about the items or service
you require. This is unlike a letter of inquiry which seeks more information
about the product in question. When placing orders, you would still use a
„good news‰ letter format.
In the following letter, Fred Lingam has placed an order for some books.
Sample Letter Placing an Order
(Letterhead)
23 September 2009
Mr Jack Chia,
Director
Bookmark Online
New Jersey, WA 98795
Dear Mr Chia,
Would you please send me the following books via COD? According to your
website, orders are to include the title, author and publisher. I have provided
these below.
Title.
„Driving Home‰
„Christmas Myth‰
„Landscaping for Fun‰
Publisher.
Peter Lawford
Margaret Smith
Janet Patterson
Author.
Jaber and Co.
New York Press
Skylight Ltd
Please contact me if you have any questions. I look forward to doing business
with you.
Yours sincerely
Fred Lingam
Fred Lingam
Head, English Department
FL/es
NOTE: The initials at the bottom of the letter indicate who the letter is from,
followed by who typed the letter for example: from Fred Lingam typed by Evy
Sofia = FL/es
The following key phrases have been used in the letter mentioned.
Would you please send /?
According to your website/magazine/leaflet, ...
COD (cash on delivery)
(c) Letter of Reply to an Enquiry
There are a number of opening and closing lines that you can use in a reply
to an enquiry. Your choice of opening and closing lines depends on the
purpose of the enquiry and the relationship you want to establish between
you and the recipient of the letter. The following are useful expressions and
key phrases you can use when responding to an enquiry, a request or when
writing a letter of acknowledgement.
ACTIVITY 6.3
1. Why is the order of information essential in business letters?
2. Look back on the examples of useful expressions you can use in
your letter of reply to an enquiry. Should these expressions be
used in the opening, body, or closing of a letter?
ACTIVITY 6.4
The letter below outlines the terms of a newly-opened business account.
(a) Has the writer used the correct order of information suggested for
„neutral‰ letters?
(b) Do you think the sender has provided all the information required?
Tick the appropriate box in the checklist to indicate whether the
writer has included the relevant information in his response.
A Letter Replying to an Enquiry
Thank you for taking an interest in our bank. As one of the leaders in this
industry, we assure you that our products and services will not disappoint you.
I would like to take this opportunity to briefly set forth our terms and
conditions for maintaining an open account with our firm. Invoices are
payable within 30 days of receipt, with a 2% discount available if your
payment is remitted within ten (10) days of receipt. We consider this
incentive an excellent opportunity for our customers to increase their profit
margin and therefore encourage the use of this discount privilege whenever
possible. We do, however, require that our invoices be paid within the
specified time for our customers to take advantage of this 2% discount.
At various times throughout the year, we may offer our customers
additional discounts on our products. In determining your cost in this case,
you must apply your special discount first and then calculate your 2%
discount for early payment.
As the credit manager, I will be happy to answer any questions you may
have regarding your new account. I can be reached at the number given in
the letterhead. Welcome to our family of customers.
CHECKLIST
Order of Information
BODY OF LETTER
“ ?
Begins with acknowledgement/reference to enquiry
Supplies necessary information or details on:
Range of accounts
Credit limit
Overdraft facilities
Interest rates
Procedures for opening accounts
Courteous close to maintain goodwill
(d) Letter Promoting New Product/Special Offers
This type of „good news‰ letter aims to influence the reader in some way,
perhaps to buy a product, pay an overdue account or consider an
application for work. The interest of the reader must be aroused so that
he/she is motivated enough to respond to the letter in a positive manner.
Many persuasive letters follow the AIDA format of writing.
See the AIDA strategy outlined in Figure 6.3 and complete the exercise that
follows.
Figure 6.3: The AIDA formula
ACTIVITY 6.5
Study the steps outlined in the AIDA strategy and read the following
statements. For each statement, identify the step by writing Attention,
Interest, Desire or Action in the space provided.
No. Statement Step in the AIDA formula
Call us at our toll-free line,
1. 1-800-22-2333, or e-mail us at
surprize@hotmail.com today.
2. How would you like to drive
around in a Mercedes 32?
3. There is no membership fee for the
first year.
No. Statement Step in the AIDA formula
4. We guarantee you 24-hour processing.
5. Apply today.
6. You will be able to use your credit card
within 24 hours of being accepted.
7. This is just the beginning of a
privileged lifestyle.
8. Membership fee is waived for the first
100 applicants.
ACTIVITY 6.6
The paragraphs in the following sales letter have been jumbled up.
Based on the criteria of a persuasive letter,
(a) Rearrange the paragraphs according to the order of information
often used in writing persuasive, „good news‰ letters.
(b) Write the correct form of the verb given in brackets so that it
agrees with the subject and suits the tense used.
UOU BANK MALAYSIA
Jalan Tun Ahmad
Kuala Lumpur
14 October 2009
Ms Priscilla Chan
32, Jalan SS3/17A
Petaling Jaya
46000 Selangor
Dear Ms Chan,
We (1)___________ (know) it is too good to be true but membership
fee (2)____________ (be/ waive) for the first 100 successful applicants.
Even if you miss this, you (3) ___________ (pay) a minimal cost of
only RM20 for the first year. Fill in the enclosed application form and
send it off in the postage paid envelope today. You will receive a free
gift immediately.
When you (4) ___________ (use) a Value Bank credit card, your
worries about carrying extra cash around (5) ___________ (be) over.
Our credit card(6) ___________ (be/accept) worldwide, whether it is
at large departmental stores or at the friendly petrol station in your
neighbourhood. It also (7) ___________ (allow) you a maximum
withdrawal of US$1000 at any of our VBC ATM outlets overseas.
Congratulations! You (8) ___________ (have/be/choose) to receive
the VCB Credit card that (9) ___________ (recognise) your admirable
credit rating. As a valued customer, you (10) ___________
(will/be/accept) at selected stores throughout the world.
Yours sincerely,
Andrew Lai
Andrew Lai
Marketing Director
Copyright © Open University Malaysia (OUM)
----------------------- Page 13-----------------------
110 ? TOPIC 6 BUSINESS WRITING 2
(e) Letter of Application for a Job
Read Claire LopesÊ letter of application for the post of Marketing/
Customer Service Representative.
Claire Lopes
38 Jalan Hang Lekiu
75200 Malacca, Malaysia.
11 November 2009
Stanley Tong
Product Manager
KLTEX
Lot 5, Industrial Estate
40200 Shah Alam
Selangor.
Application for the Post of Customer Service Representative
Dear Mr Tong,
A motivated worker with a strong foundation in business administration and
customer service is the background that I would bring to your organisation . I am
goal-oriented, able to focus on the task at hand and have proven to be reliable in
getting the job done.
I believe that I meet all your requirements as listed in the advertisement. In my
present firm, I have had exposure to a wide variety of duties as a customer
service representative. Over the years, I have developed excellent interpersonal
skills and gained extensive experience in mediating problems to find acceptable
solutions. In addition, I excel in writing clear reports and letters which are easy to
understand. I am also proficient in using most major office software and have
experience in setting up an online customer service webpage.
My present post is satisfying and the environment is pleasant but I feel that my
career would benefit from a change.
I would like to meet with you to discuss the valuable contributions I could make
to your company. I can be reached at 06-7053266.
Your consideration and time are most appreciated.
Sincerely,
Claire Lopes
ACTIVITY 6.7
Do you think Claire LopesÊ letter of application is a good one? Why?
ACTIVITY 6.8
1. Give the meaning of the following words as they are used in the text.
(i) Extensive experience
(ii) Mediating problems
(iii) Excel at
2. Look back at the text and find out what and who the words in
italics refer to.
(i) your organisation (line 2)
(ii) to meet with you (line 14)
3. Which post is Claire applying for?
4. What are the qualities that Claire claims to have developed over
the years?
5. What reason does Claire give for wanting to change her job?
6.2.2 “Bad News” Letters
A „bad news‰ letter communicates unwelcome news to the reader. This is a difficult
letter to write because it conveys bad news to the reader, yet wishes to retain his/
her goodwill.
„Bad news‰ business letters are written for various reasons, including the following:
Refuse credit;
Refuse a request;
Decline an invitation to speak at a function;
Notify an unsuccessful job applicant; and
Explain inability to fulfil an order.
The recipient of a „bad news‰ letter needs to be gently guided to finish reading
the letter so that he/she at least understands the explanation for the bad news.
Open with a courteous, neutral line that acknowledges the original request. This
may be followed by the explanation before giving the bad news. You may use the
following order of information:
Open with a courteous opening;
Explain the situation fully;
State the bad news; and
Close with a positive paragraph.
ACTIVITY 6.9
The following are some paragraphs taken from a „bad news‰ letter.
The paragraphs in the body of the letter have been jumbled. Rearrange
the paragraphs so that they follow the right order of information.
(a) The selection process reflects the importance we place on
knowledge and interest in the banking industry. We have been
able to appoint a person who has had banking experience and
previous connection with our company.
(b) Thank you for your interest in the Trainee Bank Officer position
in our organisation. You are one of three people who have been
interviewed for a second time.
(c) We will file your application for future use. When there is an
opening, we will contact you for an updated resume.
Order of Information: _______, _______, ______.
(a) Letter of Complaint
Below is a letter of complaint from Nelson Kang of The Bicycle Shoppe. Read
it carefully and then answer the questions in Activity 6.10 and Activity 6.11.
Ms E. Dan
Sales Manager
Classy Bikes Ltd.
22-33 Uni Avenue Your ref: ED/RS
Singapore 1145 Our ref: NK/ 22
14 November 2009
Dear Ms Dan,
The Bicycle Our order No 45256
Shoppe, Bayan
Lepas I am writing with reference to the above order for
mountain bicycles, which we received today.
Commercial
Centre, We regret to inform you that upon examining the
goods we found that forty of the bicycles delivered
P.O. Box 2, were racing bicycles instead of mountain bicycles.
10810 Penang,
Malaysia I must ask you to arrange for the immediate despatch
Tel: 04 -2053060 of replacements as we have firm orders from our
Fax: 04-6622123 own customers for the entire consignment.
I would appreciate it if you could advise us on what
we should do with the forty bicycles wrongly
supplied.
Yours sincerely,
Nelson Kang
Nelson Kang
Chief Buyer
ACTIVITY 6.10
1. Where is the company writing this letter of complaint based?
2. What do you think are Mr KangÊs responsibilities in his company?
3. Why is Mr Kang complaining?
4. Why does Mr Kang regard this as an urgent matter?
5. What do you think will happen to the 40 bicycles that were
wrongly delivered?
ACTIVITY 6.11
When writing letters of complaint, the passive voice is often used to
avoid direct accusations.
For example:
? You delivered the items that we ordered late.
? The items that we ordered were delivered late. (passive voice
preferred style)
Rewrite the following sentences using the passive, beginning with the
words indicated.
(a) You should have written the order number clearly.
The order /
(b) The forwarding agent sent the order by train instead of by truck.
The order /
(c) I will not pay the invoice until the faulty cameras are replaced.
The invoice /
(d) You omitted the spare screws from the order.
The spare screws/
(e) You sent the replacement parts by normal post instead of by
courier.
The replacement parts/
(f) You shipped the consignment more than a month late.
The consignment/
(g) Someone broke open two of the packages during the delivery of the
consignment.
Two/
(h) You have sent us the wrong components for a second time.
The wrong/
(i) A faulty chip caused the computer to crash.
The computer/
(b) Reply to a Letter of Complaint
CLASSY BIKES LTD
22 - 33 Uni Avenue, Singapore, 1145
Tel: 02 22882882 Fax: 02 22883883
Your ref: NK/ 22 (right corner)
Our ref: ED/ RG
18 November 2009
Mr Nelson Kang
Chief Buyer
The Bicycle Shoppe
Bayan Lepas Industrial Zone
P.O. Box 2
10810 Penang
Malaysia
Dear Mr Kang,
Your order No 45256
We thank you for your letter of 14 November in which you informed us that we
had made an error when supplying the above order.
We are very sorry we sent you forty racing bicycles instead of mountain
bicycles. This time of the year is a particularly busy one for us and there are
several orders coming in. There must have been a mix-up in the packing
department.
We have already despatched replacements for the forty racing bicycles and
instructed our representative in Penang to collect the wrongly delivered goods
as soon as possible.
Finally, we would like to apologise for the inconvenience caused and to thank
you for your patience in this matter.
We look forward to hearing of the safe arrival of the replacements and to doing
further business with you.
Yours sincerely,
Elain Dan
Elaine Dan (Ms)
Sales Manager
ACTIVITY 6.12
1. Using the line reference given, look back at the text and find the
reference for the words in italics.
(a) / in which you informed us / (line 1)
„you ‰ refers to ...................................
„us‰ refers to ......................................
wrongly delivered goods ‰ (line 8) refers to ..............................
(b) „
(c) „
the replacements ‰ (line 12) refers to .......................................
2. Give the meaning of the phrase „a mix-up‰ as it is used in the text.
3. What was the reason given by Ms Dan for the mix-up in the
delivery of the bicycles?
4. How will the wrongly delivered bicycles be returned to Classy
Bikes Ltd?
6.3 WRITING RESUMES
When you apply for a job, your prospective employer wants to know about you. He
would especially want to understand your qualifications and prior work experience
(please refer to Figure 6.4). Some companies obtain this information by getting their
prospective employees to fill up a job application form. Other companies may require
their prospective employees to submit resumes with their application forms.
Figure 6.4: Applying for a job requires you to prove your worth to your prospective employer
Source: [Untitled clip art of a job interview]. Retrieved February 11, 2010, from:
http://blog.professorastronomy.com/2005_11_01_archive.html
A resume is a summary or inventory of your qualifications and experience. Your
resume should include your:
Education;
Training and skills;
Experience; and
Achievements.
Your resume should not include personal information such as your marital
status, your date of birth, etc.
Resumes help employers:
Become familiar with a potential employee's work experience and education
prior to the interview;
By serving as a reminder, after an interview, of an employee's assets; and
Screen out unqualified applicants in a highly competitive marketplace.
Companies today receive many resumes every month. Your resume must stand
out above the rest and provide your prospective employer with a good picture
of your abilities.
ACTIVITY 6.13
Answer the following questions based on the text.
1. What are the options open to a company that wants to obtain
information about its prospective employees?
2. What kind of information does a prospective employer look for in
a resume?
3. What kind of information should you not include in a resume?
4. What purpose does a resume serve after a candidate has secured
the job applied for?
ACTIVITY 6.14
Read the following passage and choose the appropriate word or phrase
from the box to complete the blanks. Each word or phrase should be
used only once. In some cases, the first letter of the blank has been
filled in for you.
resume advertisement applicants
ambitions career prospects working environment
requirements personal qualities experience
application form interview duties
professional training letter of application further details
cover letter
There are various ways of answering an__________1 for a job. You may
be instructed to phone to arrange an__________2, obtain
f__________d__________ 3 and/or an a__________f__________ 4
Alternatively, you may be instructed to send a full r__________ 5 which
should be accompanied by a c__________l__________ 6, or to write a
full l__________of a__________7.
Whichever method is used, it is essential that prospective a__________
8 should read the advertisement very carefully to ensure that they
fully understand the type of e__________ 9, skills and p__________
q__________ 10 the employer requires. Prospective applicants should
also note the d__________ 11 they will have to perform, as well as the
w__________e__________ 12, salary, general conditions and
c__________p__________ 13 which the job offers.
They should then carefully consider if the job is suitable for them and
if they are suitable for the job. They should compare their previous
experience and p__________t__________ 14 with the r__________ 15
of the job, and also take into account their future a__________ 16.
The following resume was written by David Khoo in response to a job
advertisement. Read it carefully and then answer the questions in Activity 6.15.
DAVID KHOO
38 PERSIARAN RIMBA HUTAN 31400 IPOH, PERAK
PHONE: 05 5492 8280 MOBILE: 014 2134 207
Post applied for: Senior Systems Programmer
Education
1982 1995 St MichaelÊs School, Ipoh
Malaysian Higher School Certificate (STPM)
Mathematics B
Physics A
Chemistry B
General Paper A
1996 1998 National University of Malaysia
Bachelor of Computing Science (1st Class Honours)
Work Experience
2001 present Company: GCG Merchant Bank
Post Systems Programmer
Responsibilities: Development and programming of financial
systems using C/UNIX incorporating
LAN/WAN technology and relational
databases
1999 2000 Company: Data International
Post: Trainee Systems Programmer
Responsibilities: Assisting in the development of a new online
information system for a financial services
company
Referees
Mr Joseph Tinggom Mr Johan Bakar
Systems Manager Data Processing Manager
GCG Merchant Bank Data International
Jalan Harimau Jalan Lok Nawi
31300 Ipoh 59200 Kuala Lumpur
Current Salary: RM38,000.00 p.a.
ACTIVITY 6.15
Answer the following questions by referring to David KhooÊs resume.
1. Which job is David applying for?
2. In which year did David obtain his Malaysian Higher School Certificate?
3. In which discipline did David obtain his degree?
4. Where was DavidÊs first job?
5. Which of the referees is currently DavidÊs colleague and what is his post?
6. David earns RM38,000 p.a. What does „p.a.‰ stand for?
There are seven steps to writing effective business letters decide on purpose, determine what to say, note down the main ideas, order the main ideas, write the first draft, read and edit, and rewrite if neccessary.
„Good news‰ or „neutral‰ letters include letters of enquiry, request, reply to
enquiries, acknowledgement of receipt of letter, introduction of self and
organisation, information about an organisationÊs services and activities,
granting loan, confirming success at an interview, and giving special offers.
Ordering information or arranging ideas and paragraphs is an important
aspect of writing effective business letters.
Persuasive letters are written based on the AIDA formula Attention,
Interest, Desire and Action.
„Bad news‰ letters start with a courteous opening line, explain the situation,
give the bad news and then close with a positive closing paragraph.
There are many ways of applying for a job. You may be required to
download/ submit an application form, arrange for an interview or send in a
resume.
A resume should contain information about your educational background,
qualifications and work experience; and give details of referees and contact
information.
Bad News Letter
Neutral Letter
Good News Letter
10 OUMH2203_topic06
LEARNING OUTCOMES
By the end of this topic, you should be able to:
1. List the steps involved in writing good business letters;
2. Differentiate between good news, neutral and bad news letters;
3. Explain the differing types of information in different kinds of
business letters;
4. Practise subject-verb agreement in sentence construction; and
5. Write different types of business letters effectively.
INTRODUCTION
This topic provides you with exposure to, and practice in,
effective letter writing (please refer to Figure 6.1). You will be
introduced to various types of business correspondence, including
letters of application, letters of enquiry, letters of complaint, etc.
There are also exercises to help you develop the vocabulary and
grammatical skills needed to comprehend and write effective
business letters.
Figure 6.1: Letter writing is an art
Source: [Letter Writing]. Retrieved February 11,
2010, from:
http://www.soton.ac.uk/citizened/activities/active_citizenship/tasktwo_letterwriting.html
6.1 WRITING BUSINESS LETTERS
How do we write a good business letter? There is no simple answer to this
question. However, a good business letter definitely needs careful planning and
should never be written in haste. It is the responsibility of the writer to impress
upon the recipient the senderÊs professional image and to emphasise the
importance of the communication. A poorly-written business letter can result in
misunderstanding and put the companyÊs finances and reputation at stake.
An effective business letter is written with certain objectives in mind and
expresses these clearly. The information is usually well organised and the writer
always tries to meet the needs of the recipient. You may use the seven steps
outlined in Figure 6.2 as a checklist for writing good business letters.
Figure 6.2: The seven steps for writing good business documents
6.2 TYPES BUSINESS LETTERS
Letters generally fall into three categories. They are:
(a) „Good news‰ letters;
(b) „Neutral‰ letters; and
(c) „Bad news‰ letters.
Commonly, „good news‰ and „neutral‰ letters are written with the aim of
giving or asking for information. These letters usually try to achieve one or more
of the following purposes or objectives:
Make an inquiry;
Forward a request;
Reply to an inquiry/request;
Acknowledge receipt of letter;
Introduce self and organisation;
Inform about organisationÊs services and activities;
Grant a loan or extend credit;
Confirm success at an interview; and
Make a special offer for valued customers.
ACTIVITY 6.1
Based on the purposes of letters mentioned, identify the type and
purpose of the letters in Activity 5.8 (Paperwalls Marketing Ltd.) and
Figure 5.3 (Cleanwizards Ltd.) in Topic 5.
(a) Are these „good news‰, „neutral‰ or „bad news‰ letters?
(b) What is the purpose of each of these letters?
6.2.1 “Good News” and “Neutral” Business Letters
When you look at business letters, you will notice that the ordering of
information is important. This refers to the arrangement of ideas and paragraphs.
This ordering is important because it affects the reader's flow of thoughts and
how he or she would react to the letter.
In most cases, we present information in a direct manner for „good news‰ and
„neutral‰ business letters. However, the details in each paragraph may differ
slightly, according to the purpose of the letter. Generally, the contents of a „good
news‰ letter follow this order:
Identify the purpose of the letter in the subject line or opening paragraph;
Place the good news in the opening paragraph;
State the details that support the good news in the middle paragraphs; and
Close with a statement of goodwill.
ACTIVITY 6.2
The following paragraphs are found in the body of a „good news‰ letter.
Rearrange the paragraphs so that they read smoothly, based on the order
normally used in such letters. Then write down, in order of appearance,
the letters of the paragraphs (a, b, c ...) in the space given thereafter.
(a) We would also like to inform you that students may choose one of
the two structures offered. They may choose a modular
programme or one that requires an end-of-the-year examination.
In addition, the institution offers scholarships to students based
on their performance in the first year of study.
(b) We are an established institution with international accreditation.
Our partner universities are the University of Nova Scotia and
University of Cumberland, both from the United Kingdom. We
have a range of courses at the tertiary level including Bachelor,
Master and Doctorate degrees for a variety of disciplines.
(c) Thank you for your letter dated 23 September enquiring about the
types of courses available at our institution and the fees for each of
these courses.
(d) Enclosed, you will find our prospectus for the September/October
intake this year. The fees suggested include tuition and lab fees
where relevant. The mode of payment of the fees can be negotiated.
Please do not hesitate to contact me or my office if you would like
any further information.
(e) We look forward to hearing from you and welcoming you as our
student.
Order of information: _______, _______, _______, _______, ______
Letters categorised as „good news‰ or „neutral letters‰ include the following:
(a) Letter of Inquiry
A letter of inquiry is written when we need to ask for more information
concerning a product or service that interests us. We may have heard or read
about a product in an advertisement in the newspaper, a magazine or a
commercial on television. However, we often need more information before
making a decision about purchasing the product. Hence, a letter of inquiry,
which is also categorised as a neutral letter, is written. This uses the „good
news‰ letter format. Here are some points to remember when ordering
information in a letter of enquiry.
The start:
Dear Sir or Madam.
Although it is very formal, you may also use „To Whom It May
Concern‰ as you do not know the person you are writing to.
Giving reference:
With reference to your advertisement in...
Regarding your advertisement in ...
Requesting a catalogue, brochure, etc:
After the reference, add a comma and continue for example, „Referring
to your advertisement, would (could) you please send me ...?
Requesting further information:
I would also like to know ...
Could you tell me whether...
Signature:
Yours faithfully this is very formal as you do not know the person you
are writing to.
(b) Letter for Placing Orders
A letter of order is written when you are certain about the items or service
you require. This is unlike a letter of inquiry which seeks more information
about the product in question. When placing orders, you would still use a
„good news‰ letter format.
In the following letter, Fred Lingam has placed an order for some books.
Sample Letter Placing an Order
(Letterhead)
23 September 2009
Mr Jack Chia,
Director
Bookmark Online
New Jersey, WA 98795
Dear Mr Chia,
Would you please send me the following books via COD? According to your
website, orders are to include the title, author and publisher. I have provided
these below.
Title.
„Driving Home‰
„Christmas Myth‰
„Landscaping for Fun‰
Publisher.
Peter Lawford
Margaret Smith
Janet Patterson
Author.
Jaber and Co.
New York Press
Skylight Ltd
Please contact me if you have any questions. I look forward to doing business
with you.
Yours sincerely
Fred Lingam
Fred Lingam
Head, English Department
FL/es
NOTE: The initials at the bottom of the letter indicate who the letter is from,
followed by who typed the letter for example: from Fred Lingam typed by Evy
Sofia = FL/es
The following key phrases have been used in the letter mentioned.
Would you please send /?
According to your website/magazine/leaflet, ...
COD (cash on delivery)
(c) Letter of Reply to an Enquiry
There are a number of opening and closing lines that you can use in a reply
to an enquiry. Your choice of opening and closing lines depends on the
purpose of the enquiry and the relationship you want to establish between
you and the recipient of the letter. The following are useful expressions and
key phrases you can use when responding to an enquiry, a request or when
writing a letter of acknowledgement.
ACTIVITY 6.3
1. Why is the order of information essential in business letters?
2. Look back on the examples of useful expressions you can use in
your letter of reply to an enquiry. Should these expressions be
used in the opening, body, or closing of a letter?
ACTIVITY 6.4
The letter below outlines the terms of a newly-opened business account.
(a) Has the writer used the correct order of information suggested for
„neutral‰ letters?
(b) Do you think the sender has provided all the information required?
Tick the appropriate box in the checklist to indicate whether the
writer has included the relevant information in his response.
A Letter Replying to an Enquiry
Thank you for taking an interest in our bank. As one of the leaders in this
industry, we assure you that our products and services will not disappoint you.
I would like to take this opportunity to briefly set forth our terms and
conditions for maintaining an open account with our firm. Invoices are
payable within 30 days of receipt, with a 2% discount available if your
payment is remitted within ten (10) days of receipt. We consider this
incentive an excellent opportunity for our customers to increase their profit
margin and therefore encourage the use of this discount privilege whenever
possible. We do, however, require that our invoices be paid within the
specified time for our customers to take advantage of this 2% discount.
At various times throughout the year, we may offer our customers
additional discounts on our products. In determining your cost in this case,
you must apply your special discount first and then calculate your 2%
discount for early payment.
As the credit manager, I will be happy to answer any questions you may
have regarding your new account. I can be reached at the number given in
the letterhead. Welcome to our family of customers.
CHECKLIST
Order of Information
BODY OF LETTER
“ ?
Begins with acknowledgement/reference to enquiry
Supplies necessary information or details on:
Range of accounts
Credit limit
Overdraft facilities
Interest rates
Procedures for opening accounts
Courteous close to maintain goodwill
(d) Letter Promoting New Product/Special Offers
This type of „good news‰ letter aims to influence the reader in some way,
perhaps to buy a product, pay an overdue account or consider an
application for work. The interest of the reader must be aroused so that
he/she is motivated enough to respond to the letter in a positive manner.
Many persuasive letters follow the AIDA format of writing.
See the AIDA strategy outlined in Figure 6.3 and complete the exercise that
follows.
Figure 6.3: The AIDA formula
ACTIVITY 6.5
Study the steps outlined in the AIDA strategy and read the following
statements. For each statement, identify the step by writing Attention,
Interest, Desire or Action in the space provided.
No. Statement Step in the AIDA formula
Call us at our toll-free line,
1. 1-800-22-2333, or e-mail us at
surprize@hotmail.com today.
2. How would you like to drive
around in a Mercedes 32?
3. There is no membership fee for the
first year.
No. Statement Step in the AIDA formula
4. We guarantee you 24-hour processing.
5. Apply today.
6. You will be able to use your credit card
within 24 hours of being accepted.
7. This is just the beginning of a
privileged lifestyle.
8. Membership fee is waived for the first
100 applicants.
ACTIVITY 6.6
The paragraphs in the following sales letter have been jumbled up.
Based on the criteria of a persuasive letter,
(a) Rearrange the paragraphs according to the order of information
often used in writing persuasive, „good news‰ letters.
(b) Write the correct form of the verb given in brackets so that it
agrees with the subject and suits the tense used.
UOU BANK MALAYSIA
Jalan Tun Ahmad
Kuala Lumpur
14 October 2009
Ms Priscilla Chan
32, Jalan SS3/17A
Petaling Jaya
46000 Selangor
Dear Ms Chan,
We (1)___________ (know) it is too good to be true but membership
fee (2)____________ (be/ waive) for the first 100 successful applicants.
Even if you miss this, you (3) ___________ (pay) a minimal cost of
only RM20 for the first year. Fill in the enclosed application form and
send it off in the postage paid envelope today. You will receive a free
gift immediately.
When you (4) ___________ (use) a Value Bank credit card, your
worries about carrying extra cash around (5) ___________ (be) over.
Our credit card(6) ___________ (be/accept) worldwide, whether it is
at large departmental stores or at the friendly petrol station in your
neighbourhood. It also (7) ___________ (allow) you a maximum
withdrawal of US$1000 at any of our VBC ATM outlets overseas.
Congratulations! You (8) ___________ (have/be/choose) to receive
the VCB Credit card that (9) ___________ (recognise) your admirable
credit rating. As a valued customer, you (10) ___________
(will/be/accept) at selected stores throughout the world.
Yours sincerely,
Andrew Lai
Andrew Lai
Marketing Director
Copyright © Open University Malaysia (OUM)
----------------------- Page 13-----------------------
110 ? TOPIC 6 BUSINESS WRITING 2
(e) Letter of Application for a Job
Read Claire LopesÊ letter of application for the post of Marketing/
Customer Service Representative.
Claire Lopes
38 Jalan Hang Lekiu
75200 Malacca, Malaysia.
11 November 2009
Stanley Tong
Product Manager
KLTEX
Lot 5, Industrial Estate
40200 Shah Alam
Selangor.
Application for the Post of Customer Service Representative
Dear Mr Tong,
A motivated worker with a strong foundation in business administration and
customer service is the background that I would bring to your organisation . I am
goal-oriented, able to focus on the task at hand and have proven to be reliable in
getting the job done.
I believe that I meet all your requirements as listed in the advertisement. In my
present firm, I have had exposure to a wide variety of duties as a customer
service representative. Over the years, I have developed excellent interpersonal
skills and gained extensive experience in mediating problems to find acceptable
solutions. In addition, I excel in writing clear reports and letters which are easy to
understand. I am also proficient in using most major office software and have
experience in setting up an online customer service webpage.
My present post is satisfying and the environment is pleasant but I feel that my
career would benefit from a change.
I would like to meet with you to discuss the valuable contributions I could make
to your company. I can be reached at 06-7053266.
Your consideration and time are most appreciated.
Sincerely,
Claire Lopes
ACTIVITY 6.7
Do you think Claire LopesÊ letter of application is a good one? Why?
ACTIVITY 6.8
1. Give the meaning of the following words as they are used in the text.
(i) Extensive experience
(ii) Mediating problems
(iii) Excel at
2. Look back at the text and find out what and who the words in
italics refer to.
(i) your organisation (line 2)
(ii) to meet with you (line 14)
3. Which post is Claire applying for?
4. What are the qualities that Claire claims to have developed over
the years?
5. What reason does Claire give for wanting to change her job?
6.2.2 “Bad News” Letters
A „bad news‰ letter communicates unwelcome news to the reader. This is a difficult
letter to write because it conveys bad news to the reader, yet wishes to retain his/
her goodwill.
„Bad news‰ business letters are written for various reasons, including the following:
Refuse credit;
Refuse a request;
Decline an invitation to speak at a function;
Notify an unsuccessful job applicant; and
Explain inability to fulfil an order.
The recipient of a „bad news‰ letter needs to be gently guided to finish reading
the letter so that he/she at least understands the explanation for the bad news.
Open with a courteous, neutral line that acknowledges the original request. This
may be followed by the explanation before giving the bad news. You may use the
following order of information:
Open with a courteous opening;
Explain the situation fully;
State the bad news; and
Close with a positive paragraph.
ACTIVITY 6.9
The following are some paragraphs taken from a „bad news‰ letter.
The paragraphs in the body of the letter have been jumbled. Rearrange
the paragraphs so that they follow the right order of information.
(a) The selection process reflects the importance we place on
knowledge and interest in the banking industry. We have been
able to appoint a person who has had banking experience and
previous connection with our company.
(b) Thank you for your interest in the Trainee Bank Officer position
in our organisation. You are one of three people who have been
interviewed for a second time.
(c) We will file your application for future use. When there is an
opening, we will contact you for an updated resume.
Order of Information: _______, _______, ______.
(a) Letter of Complaint
Below is a letter of complaint from Nelson Kang of The Bicycle Shoppe. Read
it carefully and then answer the questions in Activity 6.10 and Activity 6.11.
Ms E. Dan
Sales Manager
Classy Bikes Ltd.
22-33 Uni Avenue Your ref: ED/RS
Singapore 1145 Our ref: NK/ 22
14 November 2009
Dear Ms Dan,
The Bicycle Our order No 45256
Shoppe, Bayan
Lepas I am writing with reference to the above order for
mountain bicycles, which we received today.
Commercial
Centre, We regret to inform you that upon examining the
goods we found that forty of the bicycles delivered
P.O. Box 2, were racing bicycles instead of mountain bicycles.
10810 Penang,
Malaysia I must ask you to arrange for the immediate despatch
Tel: 04 -2053060 of replacements as we have firm orders from our
Fax: 04-6622123 own customers for the entire consignment.
I would appreciate it if you could advise us on what
we should do with the forty bicycles wrongly
supplied.
Yours sincerely,
Nelson Kang
Nelson Kang
Chief Buyer
ACTIVITY 6.10
1. Where is the company writing this letter of complaint based?
2. What do you think are Mr KangÊs responsibilities in his company?
3. Why is Mr Kang complaining?
4. Why does Mr Kang regard this as an urgent matter?
5. What do you think will happen to the 40 bicycles that were
wrongly delivered?
ACTIVITY 6.11
When writing letters of complaint, the passive voice is often used to
avoid direct accusations.
For example:
? You delivered the items that we ordered late.
? The items that we ordered were delivered late. (passive voice
preferred style)
Rewrite the following sentences using the passive, beginning with the
words indicated.
(a) You should have written the order number clearly.
The order /
(b) The forwarding agent sent the order by train instead of by truck.
The order /
(c) I will not pay the invoice until the faulty cameras are replaced.
The invoice /
(d) You omitted the spare screws from the order.
The spare screws/
(e) You sent the replacement parts by normal post instead of by
courier.
The replacement parts/
(f) You shipped the consignment more than a month late.
The consignment/
(g) Someone broke open two of the packages during the delivery of the
consignment.
Two/
(h) You have sent us the wrong components for a second time.
The wrong/
(i) A faulty chip caused the computer to crash.
The computer/
(b) Reply to a Letter of Complaint
CLASSY BIKES LTD
22 - 33 Uni Avenue, Singapore, 1145
Tel: 02 22882882 Fax: 02 22883883
Your ref: NK/ 22 (right corner)
Our ref: ED/ RG
18 November 2009
Mr Nelson Kang
Chief Buyer
The Bicycle Shoppe
Bayan Lepas Industrial Zone
P.O. Box 2
10810 Penang
Malaysia
Dear Mr Kang,
Your order No 45256
We thank you for your letter of 14 November in which you informed us that we
had made an error when supplying the above order.
We are very sorry we sent you forty racing bicycles instead of mountain
bicycles. This time of the year is a particularly busy one for us and there are
several orders coming in. There must have been a mix-up in the packing
department.
We have already despatched replacements for the forty racing bicycles and
instructed our representative in Penang to collect the wrongly delivered goods
as soon as possible.
Finally, we would like to apologise for the inconvenience caused and to thank
you for your patience in this matter.
We look forward to hearing of the safe arrival of the replacements and to doing
further business with you.
Yours sincerely,
Elain Dan
Elaine Dan (Ms)
Sales Manager
ACTIVITY 6.12
1. Using the line reference given, look back at the text and find the
reference for the words in italics.
(a) / in which you informed us / (line 1)
„you ‰ refers to ...................................
„us‰ refers to ......................................
wrongly delivered goods ‰ (line 8) refers to ..............................
(b) „
(c) „
the replacements ‰ (line 12) refers to .......................................
2. Give the meaning of the phrase „a mix-up‰ as it is used in the text.
3. What was the reason given by Ms Dan for the mix-up in the
delivery of the bicycles?
4. How will the wrongly delivered bicycles be returned to Classy
Bikes Ltd?
6.3 WRITING RESUMES
When you apply for a job, your prospective employer wants to know about you. He
would especially want to understand your qualifications and prior work experience
(please refer to Figure 6.4). Some companies obtain this information by getting their
prospective employees to fill up a job application form. Other companies may require
their prospective employees to submit resumes with their application forms.
Figure 6.4: Applying for a job requires you to prove your worth to your prospective employer
Source: [Untitled clip art of a job interview]. Retrieved February 11, 2010, from:
http://blog.professorastronomy.com/2005_11_01_archive.html
A resume is a summary or inventory of your qualifications and experience. Your
resume should include your:
Education;
Training and skills;
Experience; and
Achievements.
Your resume should not include personal information such as your marital
status, your date of birth, etc.
Resumes help employers:
Become familiar with a potential employee's work experience and education
prior to the interview;
By serving as a reminder, after an interview, of an employee's assets; and
Screen out unqualified applicants in a highly competitive marketplace.
Companies today receive many resumes every month. Your resume must stand
out above the rest and provide your prospective employer with a good picture
of your abilities.
ACTIVITY 6.13
Answer the following questions based on the text.
1. What are the options open to a company that wants to obtain
information about its prospective employees?
2. What kind of information does a prospective employer look for in
a resume?
3. What kind of information should you not include in a resume?
4. What purpose does a resume serve after a candidate has secured
the job applied for?
ACTIVITY 6.14
Read the following passage and choose the appropriate word or phrase
from the box to complete the blanks. Each word or phrase should be
used only once. In some cases, the first letter of the blank has been
filled in for you.
resume advertisement applicants
ambitions career prospects working environment
requirements personal qualities experience
application form interview duties
professional training letter of application further details
cover letter
There are various ways of answering an__________1 for a job. You may
be instructed to phone to arrange an__________2, obtain
f__________d__________ 3 and/or an a__________f__________ 4
Alternatively, you may be instructed to send a full r__________ 5 which
should be accompanied by a c__________l__________ 6, or to write a
full l__________of a__________7.
Whichever method is used, it is essential that prospective a__________
8 should read the advertisement very carefully to ensure that they
fully understand the type of e__________ 9, skills and p__________
q__________ 10 the employer requires. Prospective applicants should
also note the d__________ 11 they will have to perform, as well as the
w__________e__________ 12, salary, general conditions and
c__________p__________ 13 which the job offers.
They should then carefully consider if the job is suitable for them and
if they are suitable for the job. They should compare their previous
experience and p__________t__________ 14 with the r__________ 15
of the job, and also take into account their future a__________ 16.
The following resume was written by David Khoo in response to a job
advertisement. Read it carefully and then answer the questions in Activity 6.15.
DAVID KHOO
38 PERSIARAN RIMBA HUTAN 31400 IPOH, PERAK
PHONE: 05 5492 8280 MOBILE: 014 2134 207
Post applied for: Senior Systems Programmer
Education
1982 1995 St MichaelÊs School, Ipoh
Malaysian Higher School Certificate (STPM)
Mathematics B
Physics A
Chemistry B
General Paper A
1996 1998 National University of Malaysia
Bachelor of Computing Science (1st Class Honours)
Work Experience
2001 present Company: GCG Merchant Bank
Post Systems Programmer
Responsibilities: Development and programming of financial
systems using C/UNIX incorporating
LAN/WAN technology and relational
databases
1999 2000 Company: Data International
Post: Trainee Systems Programmer
Responsibilities: Assisting in the development of a new online
information system for a financial services
company
Referees
Mr Joseph Tinggom Mr Johan Bakar
Systems Manager Data Processing Manager
GCG Merchant Bank Data International
Jalan Harimau Jalan Lok Nawi
31300 Ipoh 59200 Kuala Lumpur
Current Salary: RM38,000.00 p.a.
ACTIVITY 6.15
Answer the following questions by referring to David KhooÊs resume.
1. Which job is David applying for?
2. In which year did David obtain his Malaysian Higher School Certificate?
3. In which discipline did David obtain his degree?
4. Where was DavidÊs first job?
5. Which of the referees is currently DavidÊs colleague and what is his post?
6. David earns RM38,000 p.a. What does „p.a.‰ stand for?
There are seven steps to writing effective business letters decide on purpose, determine what to say, note down the main ideas, order the main ideas, write the first draft, read and edit, and rewrite if neccessary.
„Good news‰ or „neutral‰ letters include letters of enquiry, request, reply to
enquiries, acknowledgement of receipt of letter, introduction of self and
organisation, information about an organisationÊs services and activities,
granting loan, confirming success at an interview, and giving special offers.
Ordering information or arranging ideas and paragraphs is an important
aspect of writing effective business letters.
Persuasive letters are written based on the AIDA formula Attention,
Interest, Desire and Action.
„Bad news‰ letters start with a courteous opening line, explain the situation,
give the bad news and then close with a positive closing paragraph.
There are many ways of applying for a job. You may be required to
download/ submit an application form, arrange for an interview or send in a
resume.
A resume should contain information about your educational background,
qualifications and work experience; and give details of referees and contact
information.
Bad News Letter
Neutral Letter
Good News Letter
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